I have always planned on getting another shih tzu puppy, after Gizzy's death, but I never thought it would be so soon after his passing. I have mourned the imminent loss of Gizzy for 3 years (that's how long the vet has said that he was on borrowed time) & since September of last year, I knew he didn't have much longer. So I have had my time to grieve but I didn't think my heart would be open to another so soon. But 2 days after Gizzy died, I woke up feeling sooo blue...just like I had every morning since he had been in the hospital. There have been many required stays, in the years since Gizzy was diagnosed, but I knew he was not coming home this time.
Anyway, I woke up feeling so sad & so lonely & so bereft but after having a good cry, I was overcome w/ a sense of urgency to look in the paper... to see if the people we got Gizzy from, might have another litter available. Nevermind that it was 12 years ago, that I don't recall their names nor exactly where they live. I was filled w/ a sense of urgency to look for an ad from them in the online classifieds. Crazy, I know!
I couldn't, of course, tell whether any of the ads were made by the breeders of Gizzy. There were many ads w/ pictures of many puppies & I didn't feel any tugs at my heartstrings but when I locked eyes on this little bugger, I lost my heart right there. We drove 70 miles to see him & as soon as I picked him up, he buried his head in teh hollow of my throat & I knew he was the one for me. He's a brindle & white 9 week old...he's a singleton (he was the only one in the litter) & he thinks he's the shiht. *grins* His mother was old & they didn't think she could have any more pups...she mated w/ the male stud they have & only the one pup was born. He has SUCH personality... a more precocious pup I have never seen & he is used to getting his way. Luckily, I'm a long-time watcher of the Dog Whisperer! ;o)
I am flooded w/ memories of Gizzy at that age (he reminds me so much of him!) but strangely, I am not overwhelmed w/ the feelings of enormous loss that I was before. He's enabling me to remember Gizzy & think of him, w/out feeling like my heart is being pulled out. He will never replace Gizzy. Gizzy was & will always be, "the best damn doggie in the history of the world!" but I have a feeling that Rudy is going to rank pretty high too.
I really appreciate all of your support...I cried reading your comments. Mimi, in particular, left one that really struck a chord, "He won't be the one you lost but he will make you smile, make you love again and make you believe that the one you lost had something to do with the one you are learning to love."
You are sooo right Mimi....what a difference a puppy makes!